Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Some Funny Lawyer Questions...

Q: What is your date of birth?

>> > > A: July 15th.

>> > > Q: What year?

>> > > A: Every year.

>> > > ______________________________________

>> > > Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

>> > > A: Yes.

>> > > Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

>> > > A: I forget.

>> > > Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that  you've forgotten?

>> > > _____________________________________

>> > > Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?

>> > > A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

>> > > Q: And why did that upset you?

>> > > A: My name is Susan.

>> > > ______________________________________

>> > > Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in  voodoo or the occult?

>> > > A: We both do.

>> > > Q: Voodoo?

>> > > A: We do.

>> > > Q: You do?

>> > > A: Yes, voodoo.

>> > > ______________________________________

>> > > Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

>> > > ______________________________________

>> > > Q: How was your first marriage terminated?

>> > > A: By death.

>> > > Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

>> > > _____________________________________

>> > > Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

>> > > A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

>> > > Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?

>> > > A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

>> > > ______________________________________

>> > > Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

>> > > A: No.

>> > > Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

>> > > A: No.

>> > > Q: Did you check for breathing?

>> > > A: No.

>> > > Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

>> > > A: No.

>> > > Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

>> > > A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

>> > > Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

>> > > A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.


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